You know how they say it is the little things that matter, I do believe the same applies to cars, more so when offered/ given a lift by someone. Most times it is out of the goodness of their heart, so it is only fair that we put into practice some of the subtle gestures into share in the next couple of minutes.
Just like there’s work etiquette, dating etiquette, road etiquette, hosting etiquette, and by the way this is so new to me. Apparently, there’s “dating etiquette” too, mbu. Anyway back to the point, Car etiquette is one of those that a few people may ignore or not pay attention to yet I find so profound and so deserves its own forum/ a discussion around it. Whether you are car sharing (carpooling) or you have simply been offered a lift as a non-car owner or maybe because yours has an issue and is at the mechanic’s, it is imperative that you put ko these unspoken rules into practice.
Refrain from displaying any form of “whatabouttism” by telling the person how to drive. Here’s the thing: if you do not feel safe with or about the person driving, then don’t get in their car. Using someone for a ride, and then telling them everything they’re doing is wrong, is rude.
The other unspoken yet underlying important aspect is one of keeping time. Let’s say you and a colleague go to a similar school or church or even stay within the same vicinity and so they usually offer you a ride after work, it isn’t fair that they are in the car waiting for you and you take more time saying your goodbyes to workmates, or any other form of activity that may take a lot of time. Making them wait is kinda not kawa, as it comes off as taking advantage of their kindness, knowing that, after all they’ll wait for you. In case you feel you may delay them, communicate to them on time.
Letting them know in advance of any possible delays not only shows that you are considerate but also helps them manage their time and plan their journey with ease. Avoid being that chronic bad time keeper or unreliable person when it comes to time.
Want to eat in the car? Check with your driving colleague if they don’t mind you unwrapping your burger, chicken wings or whichever snack you have with you. I would suggest you wait until you get home, so you can freely indulge in your meal, cuz again, you want to have a journey as smooth as possible, avoiding scenarios where sauce from the burger may drip off and drop on the seats of the car, or the aroma of the meal distract the driver and they lose focus. Just like eating, I believe the same goes for smoking. Always check with them if they don’t mind, but if you can, wait until you get to your destination and do your thing, comfortably.
Music. Don’t assume that everyone loves that everyone is a fan of that new lit amapiano playlist recently landed on or Tems. You both need to be comfortable with the music on your journey, so check with your driving colleague if they don’t mind some music, and where possible, let them be the ones to connect to the car’s Bluetooth and play music. It is however to your advantage if you both have a shared music taste/ similar music interest in terms of genre and artists. It makes the journey way better. In the case that the person prefers a none- musical car, then you ought to respect that. Oh, and also don’t comment on their music tase, in case it’s them who have connected and are playing music.
Manage your small talk. Of course if you are riding with someone in the same car, to keep the journey engaging, you might engage in conversation, but do it cautiously. For example, it is very rude to ask of the price of the car the person is driving. If you are to do so, you may perhaps ask them about what their first car was, their experience with it, how their days in the driving school were, occasionally gossip ko about people who drive badly and do not respect lanes, etc etc. cuz again, you don’t have to boring. Your default location must KIBOOZI dot com; like be an interesting conversationalist. It can be about what’s been in the news recently, or bring up the Kendrick – Drake beef asking for their opinion on who you think had the last laugh. I kid you not, being a conversational person goes a long way.
Since we are of different personalities however, in case someone appears to be of few words, then let them be, and live through the silence. That’s cuz most times some people may prefer silence in the morning hours as they acclimatize themselves to the new day or so they can plan for their day. This goes both ways, whether passenger/ the car owner, bambi if someone prefers silence, please do not use it as an opportunity to practice your oratory skills for your future political career. Please, silence is a gift, donate it generously to others.
Fuel Fee or any sort of Contribution. Whereas you are not obliged to do so, I feel it is courtesy to chip in (if you are able to) when the owner of the car is at a fuel station adding fuel to the car. You can also contribute in other ways; for example by monitoring the fuel liter pump ensuring that what your colleague has paid for is what the attendant has put in exactly so your mate isn’t cheated. Growing up and sitting in my father’s car, this was one thing I personally enjoyed doing, plus collecting the receipts from the attendants after the fueling was done. Guess it explains why I am such a big fan of collecting receipts whenever I purchase or pay for stuff/ services. Asides personal accountability of tracking my expenses, it is something I grew up with. If a colleague says they wish to buy some items from the supermarket, offer to escort them.
Still on contributions, in case you are to use toll gate, it doesn’t kill, if you offer to pay that UGX 5,000 for the access ticket to the gate. Relieve your driving colleague of that expense.
Refrain from taking the back seat (if the co-driver seat is free). Sitting in the back often comes off as though your colleague/ the person dropping you off is your Uber driver and you are their boss. It doesn’t sit right ethically.
Have your seatbelt tucked in. Still dating back to my childhood, as a passenger prince in my father’s car, his only rule was that should you sit in the co-driver’s seat, please put on a seatbelt. Cars have that beeping sound they make when you don’t wear the seatbelt, and you don’t want that beep to keep shouting for you or your driving colleague either, so, soon as you sit in anyone’s car or even if it’s a hailing service car, lock in with your seatbelt. It is for your own safety while on the road.
It is also good manners that when being dropped off, kindly ask to be left at like a minute’s walk to your gate of where you stay. Again, having someone bring you up to your door gives off the “Uber – Customer” vibe; unless someone wished to turn their car/ reverse and so you need to let them in the gate so they can do so, it is good practice that they leave you in a few minutes’ walk to yours.
Ask before adjusting the controls; could be the radio or air condition). About the AC, this goes both ways, for the one driving and the one being given the lift.
On the end of the owner of the car; asides consulting with someone if they mind you having the air conditioner on or not, drive considerately, keep the car clean (cuz even you yourself would love to drive in a car that’s free of dust, unwashed scattered clothes etc), make your colleague feel welcomed, do not insist on conversation, and keep your hands to yourself. This last one is very key: If you are the type of man/ woman who often gives lifts to people who you find attractive, this is no ticket for you to bring up talks on one’s marital status, romantic history or comment on their physical attributes. As for ‘Wandering hands syndrome’, KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF. It is not that too difficult to do, is it? Respecting those in your car and yourself goes a long way too, in not just building friendships, but it is also good for the society. We owe it to one another to create a community where all are thriving. Feel I have left out any element of car etiquette? Share your thoughts. I am @Mugibson on all socials. Aye, go out there, grind on, and most importantly, let’s spread kindness.